Camel Toe!

Ok this picture just makes me laugh, but I gotta ask do women know when they are sporting a camel toe? If they know do some of them do it on purpose? Is it weird that as a guy sometimes the camel toe can be a little sexy in the right situation?

HEHE..some last minute Christmas ideas

The Perfect T-shirt

or Maybe you prefer it in black

and maybe a towel for grandpa

Puttin the HO in Ho Ho Ho!

A Little Gift from my good friend... The Sultan

Have an absolutely naughty Christmas >:-)

Weird Sex Dreams

Ok look I had a sex dream about my ex last night. Is that normal? It is kinda freakin' me out. Oh here is the weird part her current husband had put some sort of device in her Vajayjay to keep me out and I had to disable the device first.

I woke up before we actually did the deed, but just before her new husband caught us!

Oh and it really wasn't her body. I mean not that I recall. Is it weird I was with someone for so long and now I am starting to forget any aspect of it. I might just have fucking Alzheimer's I swear!


Is this normal? Has any one else ever had one of these?

I would love to hear how you analyze it!

Come to My Window

Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light of the moon
Come to my window
I'll be home soon
I would dial the numbers
Just to listen to your breath

I would stand inside my hell
And hold the hand of death
You don't know how far I'd go
To ease this precious ache
You don't know how much I'd give
Or how much I can take

Just to reach you
Just to reach you
Oh to reach you
Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light of the moon
Come to my window
I'll be home soon

Keeping my eyes open
I cannot afford to sleep
Giving away promises
I know that I can't keep

Nothing fills the blackness
That has seeped into my chest
I need you in my blood
I am forsaking all the rest

Just to reach you
Just to reach you
Oh to reach you
Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light of the moon
Come to my window
I'll be home soon

I don't care what they think
I don't care what they say
What do they know about this love anyway

Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light of the moon
Come to my window
I'll be home soon

Ugh! I can't masturbate!!

This sooo sucks...Seriously....I mean me and my right hand like have a date night and everything. Seriously being single and somewhat isolated and not being able to fire off the old pecker pistol is a serious setback to my love life.

The reason you ask?

Post-Coital headaches. Everytime I polish the ol sword my head wants to explode after ward. Getting checked out by the doctor...but these headaches continue to stalk meI am goingt to die of DSB!

I have gotten Gun SHy so to speak

Freckles

Your Freckles are like constellations on your body. I trace them with my finger I kiss the big stars with my lips. I like to explore your constellations. I am a wandering traveler seeing what new worlds of pleasure I will find. Thank you for sharing your universe with me.

*SIGH*..Breath Deeply

Just Say Yes

Could I spill the words from my mouth on how I ache they would be inadequate bursts of air from the time they parted my lips.

**Giggity****

Ok this made me laugh..and well since this is like a sex blog...wtf

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

OMFG>>>I AM SO HORNY FOR SOME REASON! Gagh!

OK I am really missing Sex today…..REALLY MISSING IT…. OK I now return you to your regularly scheduled program!

======> Insert Cold Shower here

HE TOUCHES HER

***COPIED FROM MY OTHER BLOG...CUZ...WELL...ITS JUST THAT SWEET******

Tonight at the gym a scene struck me..It made me smile..it made me laugh a little..it even gave me goosebumps. There they were, surely in their mid-eighties smack dab in the middle of the free-weight room. They stood out like frail fish out of water against the back drop of heavy weights and beefy guys with tattoos. She was tiny in her little gray sweat suit with the bottoms pulled up way too high. He was a proud Marine with his red Marine baseball cap and a old Semper Fi tattoo on his now frail forearm. Surely, one of our last few living vets of WWII. They sat on weight machines moving ever so slowly with the pin always set to the lightest weight plodding through their exercises side-by-side.

I imagine he hadn't touched her in years, ya know in THAT way. I could be wrong, but I am probably right, yet the way she looked at him with that cute wry smile and the way he looked at her as a protector and so endearing ...well...they touched each other in a much deeper way each and every time...*sigh*

Ya know sometimes I just feel like this...

Visceral..Animal Like...aggressive

Yeah so I'm a Pop Whore...

Whatever!...I can listen to a Puccini opera...be diggin' a Miles Davis chart...enjoying a Sondheim musical, and even two step to some country music all in one day. I love rock hard and soft, techno, rap, hip-hop even mariachi. There is great music in almost every genre. However, I am a closet pop music whore. Oh yeah I listen to it. I listen to it a lot. Especially in my truck, when I am traveling I will listen to it loud and proud.

However I am a closet pop whore because only a few of my friends know my predilection for pop, and if someone pulls up along side me and I have pop playing I will immediately switch my iPod to something "cooler" like rap or hard rock! :-)

This is Selena Gomez another Disney pop Whore creation, but this song is gets me thinking about a lot of things.... A LOT...any way I don't know what it is maybe it is the beat, the chord progressions, the lyrical ideas..but it just works. Anyway..it's Friday...lighten up...turn it up..and enjoy!

I miss
The way you smile at me
Your laugh
Your Touch
Your Soft Skin
Your curves
Your Quiet Voice
Your Soft Lips
Your Taste
Your Breath on my neck

The way you look into my eyes

You go back to your world. I go back to mine

It is what it is..

and although so much seems unspoken …..

Can I just say

For the record..OH man I love sex...but I won't stop so I sacrifice sleep. So I guess it could be said I love sex AND Caffeine!!...Ok I now return you to your regularly scheduled program

TMI- TUESDAY Summer Fun

1. Commando: Sexy or disgusting? Do you have a "best" commando story?

Hmm I think in general common is not very comfortable or practical. Most clothes are not designed or made for commando and therefore can be downright irritating. I can also imagine some situations where it would be really gross. I have done it, but mostly out of necessity (no laundry got done). I mean it wasn't bad and there was a certain amount of freedom, but not my cup o' tea well unless you are talking about a kilt and that is a whole other story.

2. Foreplay: Is there such a thing as too much?

I don't know that I completely understand this question when foreplay becomes too much isn't that called an orgasm?

3. Oral sex: Good if you are getting? Good is you are giving? Equally ewwwww?

Getting…Giving…I love it all really…I'd like to think I am pretty good at giving, but you never really know.

4. Orgasm: Is one per night enough or does the first one just get your motor running?
It is hard for me to orgasm more than once…very hard. I mean I keep going that is one gift I have that the "Big Kahuna" or as some of you would surely call it "my little guy" has will power and stamina. Now I will say this if you can only get me to orgasm once (which takes a while too) don't be disappointed if I don't do it again and don't assume that means I am not interested in making sure you get everything you want. However, if it does happen twice, and it has, OH MY GOD for me that is the most intense thing in the world. The second one leaves me exhausted, but oh man….

5. Morning sex: "Oh hell yes!", "Well if I have, too." or "Just get in the shower and go to work."

OH HELL YESS! I will salute you properly any morning of the week!

Bonus (as in optional): Have you ever had anonymous sex? Have you ever had an orgasm without at least knowing your partner's last name?

Yes..twice…and really I am not proud of it, nor did I find it particularly rewarding. I was young though and sex was different for me, so it is safe to say it was probably no pleasure cruise for her either.



----------------
Now playing: Mary J. Blige - Sexy

Shibari

I am fascinated with Shibari. Well not just because of the whole submission bondage thing. I mean that idea of that level of trust and submission between two partners is a total turn on...true...but the other thing are the different types of knots and tie ups. They are like art forms. I think I would like to explore this more. I remember a friend turning me on to this a while ago (Thanks Gray) and my curiosity just grows.

Anyway I am not like a bondage, or pain kind of guy (well other than gentle biting), but I can just see where some rope play could be fun with the right person.

The Most Erotic Moment

So the question came up in my FORMSPRING..what is you most erotic moment ever? I have to admit this is a tough one because a) how do I nail it down to just "one Moment" and b) what is erotic? I mean eroticism is different for everyone. It could be anything from a scene out of 91/2 weeks for some to a simple touch for others. Some people consider sex with someone they love to be the ultimate in eroticism whole others would be anonymous sex in a bathroom. For me an erotic moment does not even necessarily have to include sex, but a lot of times it is sexual in nature.

I suppose I could include some of the weirdest places I have ever had sex as erotic, but having sex in strange places in and of itself is not necessarily erotic, but I have done it on football fields , buses, gyms and classrooms. I have done it in the middle of the aerobic floor of a health club, and of course cars. Hot tubs, pools and a mountain stream too ( a warm stream as a cold one WOULD NOT work) Oh yeah and of course in strange bedrooms in strange places as well. I have even had a threesome, but I am not sure any of that necessarily qualify as erotic.

Ok, so let's see I remember a girlfriend who made me pull a car off in the middle of a forest in the middle of no where and then gave me one of the most memorable oral experiences of my life. Then there was a time I had sex on the middle of black sand beach at sunset with no one but us and dolphins in the surf. Then one of the most erotic moments I have had that really didn't involve sex was washing each others hair in the shower together. The sensation of having someone shampoo and massage your scalp naked and soapy is fabulous!! I have also used toys on my partner, oils. and things that taste good…honey is the best, but it does get sticky. I am not sure if that answers your question, but it is as close to a compete answer as I can get.

...Or are you just Happy to see me?

I was really debating on whether this should be a long or short post ( pun intended). Seriously women if you want to know the answer is yes. Whether you are married, single, engaged, straight, gay or bi most men think about their penis size..often. Now I am not going to go into the whole psychological aspect of this. We are not going to explore the id, the ego, and the Super ego here. Nope I am just going to talk frankly about penis size and why guys think about it...heck why sometimes we are even freaked out about it, and when you are with someone new we always wonder..." Is his dick bigger than mine? " <== well unless you are Peter North or something then you probably never wonder.

So you are probably asking what prompted me to write about this topic other than ..well you know...my thoughts about the size of my penis? Well there are a lot of things actually. For example, I have read some of your blogs out there. Now none of you mention penis size in general, but I have seen posts you have made about guys with big cocks. In general, no one has chimed up and said what an awful experience it was and in fact, most of the following comments were "ooh ...ahhh...oh yes I remember my favorite big dick" . The other thing that got thinking about is a friend has told me repeatedly about some register where you can post anonymously if a guy has a tiny penis. Like some sort of registry for "Cock to Avoid". I started thinking as a man I would HATE to show up on that. I am fairly confident that I wouldn't , but if I did even if it was the most infantile thing in the world my ego would still kinda take a blow ( again pun intended).

Ok so I will get the obvious out of the way. How do I feel about my little big guy. Look this is really a self image thing right? I would say I am definitely not going to end up on any porn star casting couch any time soon. However, I have never had any complaints wait maybe?.....ok well..at least not that I know of. Actually, I have had some compliments recently from past girlfriends, and I don't know if they were just being kind or really felt that way, but hey I will take what I can get. I guess I am a pretty average in length and thicker than most, and no this is NOT going to come with a picture. As far as I know there is only one digital copy out there and hopefully that has been destroyed. The thing is I am OK with the size of my pecker. Oh and like most guys I check it every day., and I am not even sure why. I mean it is always gonna be there and at my age its not like it is gonna grow no matter what I take. However, just like some women and their boobs we often think " Oh if it were just a little bigger". This is why products like Enzyte which barely even qualify as a placebo makes millions and millions of dollars each year. I mean the idea of popping a pill and getting a bigger Johnson...who wouldn't ...right?

You see part of the problem here ( and of course the reason behind our obsession) is not only our male egos, but quite frankly we don't believe you women. You are constantly telling us size doesn't matter...."It's the magic of the user not the size of the wand" ...right? Frankly, we don't believe you. That's right we are not convinced. Part of this is driven by the porn industry one of our favorite forms of entertainment. Ever seen a small dick there?..Nope, and when a guy in one of this films whips out his anaconda the girl practically falls to it like some altar of worship. Then there are your private conversations, you know, the ones you think we don't hear or read. The ones where you and your girlfriends giggle and go "oh my" ..yeah those ones. Where you talk about the big ones and how enjoyable they were..and say things like "why didn't you share?!!" Those conversations..the ones that make us say hmmmm I wonder if they are just being nice to us?

Look I know in the end this post might seem weird to you, but really I think my musings here are pretty universal. You really want to stroke your guys ego ( again pun intended) tell him how much you like his cock. However, unless it is like really big don't lie to him about the size...He'll know ..trust me. In the end I know the biggest sex organ of the human body is between the ears, and there is so much more to great sex which involve things like chemistry, attraction, experience , and even love adds to the intensity. I also understand that Vagina's well ...they are pretty from fitting...still ya know...if it were just a little bit bigger.....

----------------
Now playing: Shinedown - Devour

TMI - Sexual Healing

1. Name one thing that turns you on with unprecedented success.

Ok, so look if I give this away it CANNOT be used against me. However, I am going to go through the senses:

Smell - First off...I know this is cheap but seriously Wild Musk by Coty I don't know what it is but that perfume brings so many memories rushing back, sometimes when I am in the store I will smell it just for that reason and if I accidentally get some on my nose i get to enjoy that all day long!

Sight - A nice smile, beautiful eyes, nice hair ( you all know my pref) but seriously if she has nice eyes and a pretty smile and a sexy sway to her...the hair color doesn't matter. Like the curtains ever match the carpet anyway! ;-) That was for you Vixen! (inside joke)

Touch - I am very sensitive to touch. I am a very physical. The light touch of your fingertips against my face. Squeezing my leg. However, if you are kissing my neck, your warm breath in my ear, and then let your hand wander let's just say you are probably kicking me into the point of no return...

Hearing - I admit their are some voices that are sexy and some that are total turn-offs. I mean if you got that two pack a day voice forget it! And I once worked with this lady that had this high pitched squeaky voice that was like nails on a chalkboard. However, I find most women's voices appealing, but if you really want to know what does it for me its the things you whisper in my ear. I think whispering sweet nothings into someone's ear is one of the sexiest acts on the planet, and whispering in my ear before you cum..oh man that is the stuff vivid memories are made of.
2. Quick! Look around you and name 3 ordinary items that could be used sexually.

Ummm ok..my box of unused condoms..My iTunes collection ( the right music is totally sexy), lol..I am looking around and thinking "Oh crap what else" then I spy my handcuffs through my open desk drawer...duh!

3. Do you consider sex good even if you don't orgasm?

Oh yes, I have said it before...if she gets off even though I don't I am totally down with that. The female orgasm is such a powerful and awesome thing just to be a part of it is satisfying. I am a giver

4. If you could be the opposite sex for one day, what sexual position or act would you like to experience from the other side?

Hmmm ..weird,,,but I definitely I would like to know what oral sex is like from your standpoint. Anything beyond this is just too gay for me to describe and I can't do it :-)
5.Describe a sexual fantasy in 10 words or less.

A night with someone I am totally in love with


Bonus (optional): Pretend you're a doctor and a patient has come in with an "ache". What is your course of "treatment"?

A full body massage...Full oral diagnostics...of course I am repeatedly going to check your temperature with my thermometer, and finally 10cc's of Keniscillin *hehe*


----------------
Now playing: Marvin Gaye - How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You)

These women seriously rock my world..it is amazing!

Another anonymous Question

If you have a question..any question you would like to ask me..you can post it in the comments of this question. You may have to log out of your blogger account first, or you can email it to me from an email I would not recognize. If someone has a better method for submitting anonymous questions please let me know.

This came from an email I have not seen before: What is your favorite sexual position?

I am not sure I have a single sexual position that is best. I like to try a lot given the chance. I wrote about some of them HERE and I even included pictures to help you out. :-)

I will say I think my very favorite sex act is 69. I love oral sex and it is mutual gratification. I guess in some way that qualifies as sexual position as well. So there ya have it.

THE GIFT

When you receive a gift a truly special one the beauty of it consumes you. It is unexpected, unplanned, it is as sweet as any spring morning when you just lie there the grass slightly wet against your back staring at the beautiful sky wondering what the day will bring. My soul has been troubled for such a long time. I have been at unrest with the weight of my world beating down on me every day. I have been lonely, empty, longing for touch. A silent and private cocoon I built around myself to try and protect myself. One I had hoped to never emerge from in some small way.

Then your gift...I could study literature for a 100 years, I could learn every language on the planet and still I could not put into words what it meant to me. I wish I could tell you always, but I know that's not supposed to be. It's Ok and I understand, and I know you know that too. Still it is a moment in time that will always be in my mind. Etched with such permanence the indelible memory of touch, of taste, softness. of time, and of peace in my world. Other memories will come and go, and as I age some will fade into forever, but this one I hope to never see fade. It seems I have so few memories like that, but surely this is one of them.

Our river is divided and the course of life takes us in very different paths, but its OK because I will always have that gift. Still I think about how I wish I could tell you always about how it makes me smile. How intense it might be if the situation were different. As our tributaries all rush towards the ocean of life it is not unexpected that our streams might cross again, and when they do it might be all we can do is trade a smile and friendly glance. However, you will always know what is behind my smile and I yours, and I don't think I will ever be able to thank you enough. I don't think I will ever be able to convey how beautiful you were by the dim light. How over taken by emotion I was, and how my heart beat nervously in my chest. I still close my eyes and think about it all. I still smile, and i still breathe deeply and say "wow...just wow" under my breath. Thank you dear for my present it was one of the best ones I ever received.

Another Anonymous question

A friend said she couldn't post this question anonymously, so she just sent to me in FB and asked if I would post it and answer it, so I guess it is not so anonymous for me. However you are still welcome to ask me any question as it outlined in the previous post by anonymously or otherwise asking it in the comments of this post or the previous one.

Question: If you had one of your many fans show up and ask you out on a date, would you go? Would you have a one-night stand, like the story you wrote about?

(She is referring to my three part attempt at erotica I just finished)

Here is my honest answer:

Yes, maybe...but there would be caveats. First off I would have to not be in any sort of a committed relationship ( which I am not in currently) and that person would have to be in a position where this would not cause them problems. So in other words all parties are in understanding. I don't want anything weird or uncomfortable and I certainly don't want to be the "other man" no way, or the deciding factor on whether someone should stay in their relationship or not.

OK now that the legal mumbo jumbo is out of the way. I would definitely go out on a date no matter what regardless of some of the caveats above. I mean I am a sociable kind of guy. I like doing fun things and I do need to get out once in a while and a date can mean many things, but mostly some conversation, some laughter, some pleasant company. I am totally down for that.

Now as for the one night stand. That's a little tougher. That generally is not my style, but I am not beyond it. I mean if all the pieces fell into place and everyone involved knew there might not be a tomorrow. It could happen. I guess my biggest worry is having expectations or weirdness the next day, and I don;t just mean with the other person. I mean I might just totally fall head over heels who knows. In the end though there would have to be some serious smiles, some serious laughs, and some serious chemistry, and who knows she could show up and be totally uninterested on her part. I guess in the end I don't want my heart to hurt anymore nor would I want that person's too either, so if I felt comfortable that wasn't going to happen.....

Yeah I could totally re-enact that fantasy. yep..yep I could



So here we are tonight
You and me together
And the storm outside
And the fire's bright
Oh, and in your eyes
I see what's on my mind
You've got me wild
Turned around inside

Oh and then desire, see
Is creeping up heavy
Oh inside here
And do you feel
The same way as I do now
Let's make this an evening
Lovers for a night, lovers for tonight

Why n' stay here with me, love, tonight
Just for an evening
And when we will make it
Our passionate pictures
You and me twist up as secret creatures
And we'll stay here
Tomorrow go back to being friends
Yeah, Oh, go back to being friends

But tonight let's be lovers,
We kiss and sweat
We'll turn this better thing to the best
Of all it can offer
Oh, this rogue kiss
Tangled tongues and lips
See me this way
I'm turning and turning for you
Ah girl, ah just tonight run away
Yeah, with me for an evening
Ah, just wait and see
But then tomorrow go back to your man
I'm back to my world
And we're back to being friends
Oh wait and see me
Ah tonight let's do this thing
All we are is wasting hours
'til the sun comes
It's all ours
On our way here, yeah cause
tomorrow go back to being friends

Yeah, oh go back to being friends
Tonight let's be lovers, oh please
Tonight let's be lovers, say you will
Tonight let's be lovers, oh yeah
Tonight let's be lovers

And hear me call,
Oh soft-spoken whispering now
Well, a thing or two I have to say here
Tonight let's go all the way then
Oh lover I can see you
Just for an evening
Oh, let's strip down
Trip out at this
One evening's hour starts with a kiss
And away yeah, then

And tomorrow back to being friends yeah
And now lover, love you, yeah,
Just for tonight, one night, love you,
And tomorrow say goodbye
Tomorrow say goodbye..

Q&A TMI

First off that smiley face..is what it is...OK? Secondly I wanted to try something new here. Go ahead and use my comment section to ask me a question. Ask me any question that is sexual in nature and I will at answer it honestly. Whether it is about guys, women, preferences, you name it. You ask it and I will answer it. You are welcome to use the anonymous option as well. Ok..make sense...ASK Away!

A Story - The ending (The happy ending *snicker*)

She was pulling him up back towards her and he knew what that meant. She wanted him inside of her and she wanted it right now. He felt so proud of himself he was still in control and he was going to tease her even more. He knew she was hot, wet and ready to go. She would be soft, slippery and tight with her wrapped around his hard cock. When his mouth reached her face she kissed him deeply and eagerly and before he knew what was going on she flipped him to his back. He was surprised, he laughed a little bit, but before he knew it the sensations made him gasp and even moan a little. She was over him now. She was in control. She was straddling him, kissing him. As her hair hung down around her face he thought to himself how fucking sexy that was as she kissed his neck, his chest, as she played with his nipples in her mouth and reached down and grabbed him. He was so hard and throbbing at this point it almost hurt. It never occurred to him until just this moment how long he had denied himself any pleasure. Her hair brushed along his skin as she moved further south with her kisses.This sensation gave him goosebumps from his head to his toes. He reached down and ran his fingers through her hair and just watched.

She grabbed him firmly and began to tease his cock with her tongue. She was having fun now. She was in control and she was going to drive this man crazy. She had talents too ya know. This was not unfamiliar territory for her. She licked around the head and tickled that spot right in the back where the head met his shaft. This made him arch his back and moan. She looked up at him with this evil grin knowing she was going to return the favor for his merciless teasing earlier. She gently took his balls into her hand and licked the entire length of his shaft. It was all he could do not to lose it at this point. The delayed gratification only intensified things . Then after what seemed like an eternity she took him into her mouth. The sensation made him feel waves of pleasure. Her mouth was warm, and wet and inviting and a sensation seemingly long forgotten by him. Her lips were soft and sensual as they wrapped around him and his instinct was to reach down and gently grab her head as she took him in and out of her mouth in long sensual strokes. He could feel the pressure and sensation as she sucked on him and he felt so swollen at this point. She continued to play with his balls as she took him deeper and deeper into her mouth. She would take a break every once in a while to lick and stroke him then go right back to taking him in her mouth. She loved the feel of him in` her mouth, the taste, the saltiness, the feeling of power it gave her over him. He was her plaything at his point. He held off as long as he could and then he had to pull her away. He wanted to cum, but not now, not yet, but man oh man he was so close.

It was time. She wanted this man inside of her and she wanted it now. She straddled herself across him and she grabbed his cock and pointed it right inside her. He looked at her and she smiled as she lowered herself on to him. He watched as his cock disappeared inside her and her smile turned to a moan. He grabbed both of her hands as she rocked herself back and forth on top of him. She was so hot inside. He could feel her wetness on his hips. He looked at her and in his mind it was so surreal. He loved every one of her full curves, She was not perfect and neither was he, but she was stunningly beautiful. Her erect nipples, her hair stuck to her slightly sweaty face at this point, her hips swallowing him, her eyes closed, her mouth slightly open, the moans. The smell of her, the taste of he was totally engulfed in this moment. In and of its own way it was perfection. As her breathing increased, so did her moans, and as she began to say "oh God Yes" he began to thrust his hips up to meet hers. At first he grabbed her breasts, ann then he dug his fingernails in as he grabbed her hips. She was still in control at this point, moving and positioning herself for the best sensation. As she came she dug her fingernails into his chest. The pain and the intensity of it all only added to his sensation and he let go. It was intense, it was like lightening, he thrust upward and he exploded inside of her. He felt the muscles of her contract around him with each push. After they both finished she leaned forward to kiss him. She was soft and salty and her hair stuck to his face as they kissed and he loved it. He was still inside her and she giggled as she flexed squeezed him to let him know what she was capable of. "You like" she asked "oh yeah" he said then he said "how about you?" she kissed him tenderly and whispered in his ear "oh yes and that is just round 1"

They played in that bed until the sun came up, resting in between rounds only long enough to regain their strength. The teased and played, they laughed and traded control. They tried as many positions as they could think of. At times though he loved just being at top, pinning her legs wide open behind his arms and just burying himself deep inside her. She loved the long strokes of when he would take her from behind, slamming himself into her. In the morning they slept in each others arms. In the end he was not sure what this evening meant. He wasn't upset about it though. The moment was nice and it had been so long and that is all he wanted to think about. He stroked her hair, He watched her breathe for a while. He smiled, he went back to sleep.

Bad Sex CQW...a guest post

The following is a post from a guest who wishes to remain anonymous. Now to be fair I left a relationship because of non-existent sex, but not necessarily bad sex. I think every relationship has some bad sex in it. Look when you are married, working, kids, jobs, places to be sometimes you have to "Pay the Rent/Mortgage" as they say. I am not a huge fan of this kind of sex, but it has its place. I think the author is referring to Bad sex that is consistent regardless of conditions. Of course I may have to look her up on that whole nympho thing ;-)

On a good note I was not unfamiliar with any of her suggestions for good sex. I am pretty much on board with them all. I think some of that comes with age and experience. If I am to put a plug in for older guys who know what to do in the sack we know to ask, and we like being told. We know to tell a woman she is beautiful and how to make her feel special. It tends to be more about them and less about us.

So here it is. Do you agree with the author's description of bad Sex or Lousy Sex? Do you think bad sex is something to leave a relationship for? What do you think about her tips for potential lovers?

____________________________________________________________

Bad Sex: A Necessary Evil?

As a self-proclaimed Nympho, I always thought that any sex was better than no sex, or even solo sex. Boy, was I was wrong. Nobody deserves bad sex. If you are in a relationship having bad sex, either change the sex or change the partner.

My definition of bad sex:

* When he doesn’t make eye contact.
* When he doesn’t kiss you.
* When there is no foreplay.
* When he doesn’t seem to attempt to make you climax.
* When he’s done, he gets up and washes off his penis in the sink.
* When he rolls over, turns his back to you and quickly goes to sleep.
* When he doesn’t say, “I love you” or doesn’t even say anything at all.

Personally, I’d rather play “solitaire”, if you know what I mean. At least if I don’t “win”, I know I tried.

I’d even settle for lousy sex, which I believe is a step up from bad sex. I define lousy sex as:

* When the intimacy session lasts longer than 10 minutes.
* When you include more than one position.
* When he takes the time to undress; not just pull his pants down.

I don’t speak for all women, but in case I ever have sex on the open market again in this lifetime, I hereby issue this open letter to men:

– PLEASE ask your woman what feels good and then DO IT. I don’t care if you’ve been together for years, keep on asking and keep on doing! Don’t get lazy. We have choices and we’re not afraid to use them.

– PLEASE tell your woman what you love/like about her. THIS WILL COUNT TOWARDS FOREPLAY. Tell her if you love her, if you’ve been thinking about her all day or if the way she looks in that dress turns you on.

– News Flash: Telling her that your dick is hard is not a turn on for most women. We don’t care. Waving it around doesn’t turn us on either. You just look silly.

– There are dozens of erogenous zones. You will get a prize for finding all of them.

As for me, I’ve concluded that life is too short to accept bad sex as a part of a relationship. Bad sex makes you feel bad, which I believe is the exact opposite of its original intent.

If you are having bad sex, speak up! If he cares about you, he’ll make some changes. If he doesn’t, say no to the Neanderthal and invest in a mechanical replacement, sold in adult stores near you. They don’t snore, leave their beer bottles everywhere and they are always there for you when you need them, as long as you have an endless supply of AA’s.

TMI - Fat Tuesday

1. Have you had sex with another person in 2010? Have you passed on an opportunity to sex with another person in 2010?

No, and the opportunity has not even arisen that I am aware of. It probably seems pretty pathetic the whole idea that I even have this blog doesn't it? Any takers?

2. What is the funniest thing you have ever said or done during sex? (Orgasmic facial expressions do not count.)

Does falling off the bed and sustaining a sex injury count? I have actually managed to do that. other than that although I am pretty comedic by nature I take my sex straight with no chaser. :-)

3. What is the first thing you notice about a member of the opposite sex?

Hmmmm seriously Hair, eyes and smile. I admit will check out her ass and chest too, especially if she makes them obvious. Although I like most women's curves and the uniqueness of them. However, I am a sucker for a pretty smile and beautiful eyes.

4. What is the best pick-up line you have ever heard? Every used? Ever been used on you?

Never used one. If I like a woman I'll just try to start a conversation. If she looks good I'll eventually just work up the nerve and tell her how great she looks. I have never had a line used on me. I think even it was totally goofy I would be flattered by it though, but then again I am sure it is different for guys.

5. Where is the most unique you have ever had sex?

On a football field underneath the bleachers, In a VW van totally stuck in the mud, and on the middle of the floor of a health club(umm after it was closed of course I am not sure I am good enough to have done it during business hours :-).

Bonus (as in optional): Do you pee in the shower? If so, has any SO known that you pee in the shower? Has any SO peed in the shower?

Well sure I have peed in the shower and do pee on occasion, but mostly I avoid it. I mean the toilet is right next to the shower, and at the gym I NEVER pee in the shower. I have never had a SO pee in the shower that I am aware of, but I don't think I would be grossed out or offended by it. Now if she gave birth in the shower I might be a little put off...just sayin'

A Story Part II

Her shirt was off and soon her bra was off too. The feel of her flesh against his hands filled his head with the idea of how much he had missed being close to someone. The intensity sent chills up his spine. He gently cupped one of her breasts and kissed her deeply as she worked feverishly at his shirt buttons, and then his belt. He was swept up in the moment and he moved from her mouth to her neck to her collar bone to her shoulder. She was pinned up against the wall and loved having his mouth and weight against her. As his mouth moved to one of her breasts she reached down and took hold. He shuddered, he gasped he almost stopped to catch his breath. He put her breast in his mouth. At first he kissed it gently then he swirled his mouth around her hardened nipple. He played with it at the tip of his tongue as she made him grow intensely hard. He grabbed her hips and held on for his life.

Suddenly he picked her up and took her to the bed and laid her down all the time kissing her and having her pull at his hair. The breathing was heavy and both of them could feel the sparks. There was no script there was no plan there was only the moment. He tore her pants off and smiled as he saw the little panties she had on. He had wondered if she knew this evening was going to happen all along they were so sexy. He ran his fingers along the inside, gently and slowly. He knew what he was doing now. His motions were smooth, gentle and deliberate. He was teasing her, creating anticipation. He felt her wetness he longed to taste her. He began to work his way down slowly kissing and tasting every inch along the way. He was taking his time. It was about control and as eager as he was to be on top of her, to be inside her he would make this moment last forever. As he worked his way down he slowly slid her panties down her legs, and she did the rest to wiggle out of them and kick them away. She laid back and grabbed the hair on his head and parted her legs. He reached down and just let the tips of his fingers glide over her mound. She let out a slight moan. He asked her if she liked that, but he already knew the answer. He positioned his head between her legs and gently pushed her knees back exposing her even more.

She willing obliged him and was trying to force his head into her. He resisted though and continued to tease her by gently using his tongue around the outside of her. Tracing along her like an artist outlining the portrait of his most intense moment ever. Then he used long strokes with his tongue to gently part her and traced his tongue along the inside of her. He could taste her, and feel her wetness on his chin. Then he went to her spot.. to her clit. At first he just played with it in quick short strokes to heighten her anticipation and draw her into his intensity. Then he began to circle it with his tongue. She had no idea he had such talents, but he knew exactly what he was doing and this time she moaned "Oh God yes" . He worked her clit with his tongue and as her thrusts grew more intense he would gently take her between his lips while continue to stroke her like there was no tomorrow. She pulled hard at his hair and as she did he reached up both hands and took her hard nipples between his thumb and forefinger gently pinching them and rolling them in between. As he her breath grew stronger, and her back arched, as she cried out he gently slipped a finger inside her and began to stroke her as his tongue worked faster and harder. He then shoved his hands under ass and grabbed her her hard with both hands. She was holding her own knees at this point. She yelled out now "oh yes like that don't stop!" and he didn't. He worked even harder now. The waves of of intense pleasure began to sweep over her body. They grew stronger with each stroke and her muscles began to contract. She grabbed his head and looked down at him hard at work then threw her head back and moaned so loudly as she came. He kept going then eventually slowed his pace. She pulled at his head to come back up to her. She wanted him deep inside of her now. She wanted him to feel how hot and wet she was. He got the message as his mouth slowly worked his way back up to hers....to be continued....

TMI - Tuesday ...A story break

I admit I still need to finish my story, but I have to be in the right mood to do it, and I have been battling so many things It just has not been in me. I will do some TMI in the meantime.

1. LUST: Besides your current Significant Other who do you lust for or have you lusted for?

Hmm since I don't have a S.O. I am free to lust for whomever...right? There is this woman in let's say in a country a little north of me. I lusted after her the other night. I would like to say thanks for everything. You are welcome to drunk email me A-N-Y-T-I-M-E! That was fun. You know who you are! ;-) A little more local..well there is one I'll admit I have lusted after her, but now I have kept it in check. Its a bit more than lust and ..hmmm.. man I could really ..I cannot even put it into words, but if she just gave me a chance. Not sure that will ever happen, but I can't spend my nights up worrying about it. Still I think I would show her some some pretty amazing and unbridled passion.

2. GLUTTONY: What food brings out your inner glutton?

Seriously... Crab legs, Chocolate, and Ginger Snaps. Of course not all at once, but certainly at different times. Oh oh oh I almost forgot whipped Cream from the can. I love that stuff and oh yes I WOULD Definitely eat it slowly off of you. I would lick every single bit of it. Just put it where you want my tongue to go! :-)

3. GREED: What are you greedy for?

Really?? sexually I think that is fairly obvious..umm...anything :-) I am also greedy for steady work, and I am working like a mofo to find it. I am college educated, and I have a lot of specific skills and talents. I am sure it won't be much longer...right?

4. SLOTH: What is your plan for an ideal day of sloth?

I really mean it when I say this. The perfect sloth day would be spending the day in bed with someone I was totally in love with. In reality I don't hold much hope for this any more. In fact, I try not to even think of it, and so it has become difficult to imagine. Still the idea is nice. even if it seems silly and sentimental to some.

5. WRATH: Describe a time that you let out a can of whoop ass on someone.

Yeah I got a problem with wrath. I am not an angry man, but there are times I could seriously destroy someone, and I am pretty capable of it. I like to refer to it as my inner "New York" There was a moment about a year ago when a guy I know who happened to be a lurker on my other blog took a pot shot at my failed marriage. He basically said that based on what he read in my blog its no wonder my wife left me. Which of course couldn't be further from the truth, but seriously for a while I was going to beat the shit out of him. I mean put him down hard. If someone harmed one of my children I would probably be that guy who jumps over the guard rail at court and just wails on the dude. It takes a lot really to get me to a point where fight or flight kicks in, but I would probably be pretty dangerous if forced to fight.

6. ENVY: Who or what do you envy? Why?

Envy..hmm this is a tough one. I mean there are possibilities for so much here, but when does it go from infatuation, admiration or mild jealousy to envy. After thinking about it I think this example is as near a definition of Envy as I can get>>> Ok, so there is this person and she was going with a guy who basically discarded her when he was done with her. I was envious because he totally had her heart and didn't care one bit about it, and it was the only thing I wanted and couldn't have. Some of which had to do with the way he had left her emotionally. That is envy. Make sense?

7. PRIDE: Have you ever had to swallow your pride? What are you proud of?

Truthfully, I swallow my fucking pride every goddamn morning these days. What am I proud of?
well I am proud of my children. They make me cry sometimes I am so proud of them. I am proud of the way I handled my divorce and treat my ex. I always try to be decent , civil, and not an ass. When I am an ass I am quick to apologize and fix the situation. I think if you talked to her she would agree. I am proud of the fact that I still get up every morning and fight the good fight even though most days are like a hard kick in the nuts. I am proud of my two world championships. They may not mean much to most folks, but twice I was undisputed the best in the world at something and that was no small feat trust me. I spent a lot a lot a lot of hours preparing with 128 other folks on my team.

A story

THE TMI questions didn't relly do anything for me this week and I couldn't title this story..so enjoy it for what it is.
********************************************
He looked across the room. His eyes were fixated on her if even for a moment. He prayed she didn't notice, he didn't want to seem desperate or strange, but she was amazing. She stopped him dead in his tracks and he wasn't even sure why. He had no hopes though. He wasn't hoping to meet her, and he certainly didn't think she would notice him. After she passed out of site he lowered his head and shook it a little bit , smiled, and thought to himself what was he even thinking. He was lonely there was no doubt about that, but these things never seemed to work out for him, so he did what he always did. He pushed it down he swallowed hard and went on talking to friends, having a few drinks and getting on with the night. Still he was distracted in his head and he wondered. She left him breathless if even for a moment.

The night wore on, the crowd got larger, and the music seemed to get louder. He slipped away to another part of the party, a place a little quieter, and where he could get a re-fill on his drink. He used to think of it as liquid courage, but as the evening carried on it was just to get him through another night. He turned around and suddenly there she was right in his face, and for a moment in time he was frozen. He smiled and tried to be charming, but admittedly he always felt awkward. "Hi" she said I saw you earlier " Do I know you?" . He cracked some joke..lame at best..but she laughed. It was a start of a conversation. It was nice and it was everything he could do to hide how nervous he was. He always seemed to blow it at "Hello", but things strangely enough were going smoothly. She was giving him signs, but he wasn't getting it..nope not a clue. She touched him, she talked to him as if no one else was there, she flipped her hair. How could he not see what was going on here. They had common friends and common interests, but all he could see was a conversation that would eventually fade and she would disappear. He wouldn't know well enough to ask her out again, or even get her number, but still they talked and enjoyed each other's company.

As the evening wore on she suddenly leaned into him and whispered "would you like to go somewhere more private?" He leaned back rather quickly, and looked at her and she smiled at him. At first he thought maybe this was a joke, or maybe a friend had put her up to it. This stuff just NEVER happens to him..never. He struggled for the words, and he doesn't know how but "Yeah that would be nice" slipped from his lips and she took him by the hand.

She lead him into a room somewhere in the house. It was quiet and dark. He nervously joked "Now What" and she kissed him and He kissed back. He brushed the hair from her face and tucked it behind one ear and he kissed her neck, and then her ear. He made his way back to her lips and ran his fingers through her hair and as he pulled her in and kissed her even more deeply. His other hand was in the small of her back. He wanted his hand to wander, but he didn't know if he should. He still didn't want to seem to forward. Her hands slid from his face, to his broad shoulders, along his chest and down the side of his body. Then she grabbed his crotch. He gasped it had been such a long time, and then suddenly for no reason he began to tremble. He pulled back, and she could feel him tremble. She whispered in his ear "Its OK baby just relax" she knew he was nervous and she was glad to exert some control.

As soon as he heard those words he relaxed. Then it all came rushing upward. The desire, the passion the fire..the pure lust within him. He remembered it all. It had been so long but it was always there just boiling under the surface. He kissed her, He pulled at her, and his hands went up her shirt and she raised her hands so he could easily slip it off over her head...... to be continued.....

There is a story coming

OK, I see you ladies write a lot of erotica...I am gonna take a shot...very soon. You know guys can write this stuff too, and I think I can do a little bit better than "We did it...Booyah!" :-) Who knows maybe even another HNT this Thursday. We will see how it goes...baby steps.....

TMI - Tuesday ..OMG Yes this is TMI

TMI Tuesday - The Masturbation Love Making Edition

1. When you masturbate, how long, typically, is your session and what do you think about (other than having an orgasm)?

Oh see now guys its different. I mean sometimes it can be like blam and you are spackling the walls, or sometimes it can take forever ESPECIALLY if you lose concentration. Believe it or not sometimes it takes forever, and doesn't even happen and you give up. Sure, I try to keep my "eye on the prize" but then other thoughts creep in...Football...Pizza...Beer..Bills...To Do List...crap...fail! Yes, we also fantasize Twosomes...Threesomes...Foursomes...you get the picture.

Oh and for the record if you are female and reading this. I very may well likely have fantasized about YOU, one of your pictures, a story you wrote or all three! :-D

2. Have you ever been "caught" masturbating?

Yes, by the Ex and if I am being honest I didn't feel very guilty about it. She caused me to have to masturbate a lot. In fact, I think she probably preferred my masturbation to our sex life at one point!

3. Have you ever masturbated in front of your computer? If 'yes' was it for your own purposes or for someone's viewing pleasure?

Yes ...of course...I mean like the Internet is for Porn right? I mean what guy hasn't seriously! It was purely for my own pleasure I am not doing that on a webcam! Well not yet at least. I think it is sexy watching females masturbate (I prefer it live instead of online). It is sexy as hell, although I don't know if women feel the same about watching guys polish their sword. I have known some women who would have been upset if they knew I masturbated while I was with them. However, let me to say to every woman who has ever wondered. If you find your guy in an act of self-love don't panic! I repeat DO NOT PANIC its not about YOU! Seriously, if a guy is masturbating it does not mean he does not want you. Think of it almost as a physiological function of male existence. It is actually a healthy thing, and if he doesn't keep that gun loaded all the time your sessions are likely to last longer.

4. Have you ever attended a group masturbation party? Same-sex or mixed?

Ewww..really these things exist? "Clean Up on aisle 6...and Hal we are gonna need a bucket!"

What do the invitations even look like? Oh I know little gold lamps and you rub them over and over and the invitation pops out!

5. When masturbating, as you reach orgasm, do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside? Or?

"do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside" WTF?!!! LOL...this question was OBVIOUSLY written by a woman! :-)

6. Have you ever video'ed yourself while masturbating (solo)? Where are they now?

No no no no no no..no way...wait...oops ..well not really. I mean there is kind of a picture out there somewhere. I mean it has been destroyed on my end. I can only hope she did the same AS PROMISED...or her computer got a virus, or her hard drive crashed, or it was destroyed in a flood. I mean a thought of the big purple people eater out there somewhere on the interweb...yikes!

Bonus (as in optional): How often do you use the word "fuck" (or its derivatives) in casual conversation - frequently, occasionally, rarely, never.

Ummmmm..did I mention I am from upstate New York, and that I marched in Drum Corps. Oh and that I grew up around volunteer firemen. I mean its like part of the curriculum growing up. In fact, I remember being taken out of class in the second grade to view the following instructional video! :-)





----------------
Now playing: The Vapors - Turning Japanese

Sexual Healing

Yeah..no...I haven't received any sexual healing yet (God I wish) still I am not willing to let this part of me go just yet. I guess I am trying to keep hope alive. This does not mean I am being overly optimistic I am gonna "get some" any soon, but it does mean I am not going to close my eyes and my mind to the possibilities. I mean after all I may be in my early forties, but I am virile , strong, and quite capable of performing ( and performing, and performing, and performing :-)). Seriously though it may have been a while, but I still know my way around the bedroom and female anatomy for that matter. I mean I may not be a master at something like "rope skills" but I was a Boy Scout and I can still tie a good slipknot! :-)

Any way I have been thinking about the things that have been holding me up and holding me back and they are all in my head. I think part of the problem is maybe expectations, but again I don't want to drop my standards. I think this is maturity speaking and not stupidity. I don't need to get laid for the sake of getting laid. Certainly not the first time out the shoot. I have thought about this a lot, and considering the fact that I have not been with another partner for a long long time, add to that I am coming up on nearly two years with nada I don't want just a "roll in the hay" necessarily. Yes, its true it is probably exactly what I need, but I want it to be with someone special. Not necessarily marriage special, or even love special, but someone I feel completely comfortable with. Ya know, so if things are a little rough I don't feel embarrassed or weird in any way. Someone I can take my time with, and have fun with and be relaxed with. I know this ideal is a little difficult to quantify in words, but I think most of you get the picture. This may not be someone I will spend the rest of my life with, but someone I will share a part of me with, and I just want to know it is not going to become public fodder, or a situation I regret.

I am comfortable with the idea this may take a little longer to achieve than just a quick lay and I am cool with it.

In the meantime this is some pretty funny shit from our friends across the pond. It is too sexual in nature to post on Facebook, so I thought I would share it with you pervs. I know sometimes its hard to understand because they barely speak English :-) but I think you will get the picture.

No fucking idea what to write anymore

Seriously, someone once asked me "If I was seeing someone who didn't like what I wrote here could I give it up?" My answer was if it was the right person for the right reason absolutely. This blog will never take the place of a good and meaningful relationship. The truth is quite frankly I could give this blog up for less. First off I have been sick for three days straight, so as you can imagine I am not feeling very sexy. However, I am not sure what the point is anymore. I think if you have a sex blog you should have something to write about. I read about your trysts, your hot dates with your husbands, even your secret hot rendezvous, and I got nothing. I am no longer sure if it makes me feel any better or worse to write here. I am losing sight of what the value is of posting half naked pictures of myself or divulging my secret sexual tendencies. In fact, I am not even sure if anyone is even really reading this blog.

Yeah I like sex, yes I love women but the reality is both of them escape me, and I am not even sure I want to think about it. It's just frustrating and makes me feel broken inside to be honest. Seriously, I feel like something is wrong with me and I wish I knew what it was.

If I decide to keep posting here or not, well I will just have to let life decide that for me. I know its sad but it is like the spark, the passion, the fire inside of me is fading into acceptance...maybe I should just get a cat and sweater vest.

TMI - Tuesday/Wednesday..whatever ..To be or not to be

1. Have eyes that always smile or a voice that makes people calm?

Well since I am half Irish I already have smilin' eyes, so a voice that makes people calm. I actually already have that too. I spent many years working on the phone, and have become acutely aware of voice tone, inflection, and what people say. I can calm you or provoke you on the single turn of a word if I am concentrating. It is a skill. I have been told by a lot of people I have a great phone voice perhaps I should consider making a living doing phone sex :-)

**Oh and for the record, just cause I am a professional doesn't mean I am not human and when I lose my cool I still stay stupid shit on the phone...I am a total goof sometimes!!

2. Have an affair and your partner catches you or your partner have an affair and you catch him/her?

Really neither...both would break my heart. My ex caught me mid sentence in an emotional affair. It was without a doubt the single most worst moment of my existence on this planet. In some ways I am sure she would have rather caught me mid-coitus than read that sentence. I used to joke with her that if she was having an affair I only had one request "let me watch". She hated that and in some ways I suppose it was cruel. I am sure she realized I didn't really mean it, but deep down inside it was more of cry for any type of attention versus what I was getting then which was zip. However, if I have to pick an answer I will go with what others said and say "catch her" cuz it took me a long long long time to repair myself from feeling like such an awful heel.

3. Have better sex or more money?

I bet you thought I would say better sex, however I am going to say more money. The sad truth is with more money I could probably be having more sex in which case I would only improve.

4. Be able to read everyone’s mind all the time or always know the future?

Oh fuck no doubt about read every one's mind all the time. You would think that would drive someone insane, but man oh man it would shave so much time off in the dating world. I mean think about it you are going to know in the first 2 minutes of date whether you are going to get laid or dumped. It is the difference between taking her to a fine restaurant or MacDonalds, or even better feigning a sudden illness and saving yourself from having to spend anything on the dollar menu!

5. Your partner have sex with someone else or fall in love with someone else?

Yes, this has been asked. men are territorial..it's in our nature...so neither. However, if forced to chose then sex..cuz you don't just fall out of love, but I have fallen out of bed many times.

Bonus (as in optional): What one thing, big or small, would you change in your life if granted one wish by a lamp-bound genie? Why

Really did you HAVE to use the words Big or Small? With my luck the Genie would be partially deaf . I would be standing in my living room with a tiny guy playing piano screaming at the Genie "WTF?!! I DID NOT ASK FOR A 12 Inch Pianist!!" Seriously I would ask that Genie to make me a US Senator in a state without term limits, so I could be set for life.