TMI - Tuesday ..OMG Yes this is TMI

TMI Tuesday - The Masturbation Love Making Edition

1. When you masturbate, how long, typically, is your session and what do you think about (other than having an orgasm)?

Oh see now guys its different. I mean sometimes it can be like blam and you are spackling the walls, or sometimes it can take forever ESPECIALLY if you lose concentration. Believe it or not sometimes it takes forever, and doesn't even happen and you give up. Sure, I try to keep my "eye on the prize" but then other thoughts creep in...Football...Pizza...Beer..Bills...To Do List...crap...fail! Yes, we also fantasize Twosomes...Threesomes...Foursomes...you get the picture.

Oh and for the record if you are female and reading this. I very may well likely have fantasized about YOU, one of your pictures, a story you wrote or all three! :-D

2. Have you ever been "caught" masturbating?

Yes, by the Ex and if I am being honest I didn't feel very guilty about it. She caused me to have to masturbate a lot. In fact, I think she probably preferred my masturbation to our sex life at one point!

3. Have you ever masturbated in front of your computer? If 'yes' was it for your own purposes or for someone's viewing pleasure?

Yes ...of course...I mean like the Internet is for Porn right? I mean what guy hasn't seriously! It was purely for my own pleasure I am not doing that on a webcam! Well not yet at least. I think it is sexy watching females masturbate (I prefer it live instead of online). It is sexy as hell, although I don't know if women feel the same about watching guys polish their sword. I have known some women who would have been upset if they knew I masturbated while I was with them. However, let me to say to every woman who has ever wondered. If you find your guy in an act of self-love don't panic! I repeat DO NOT PANIC its not about YOU! Seriously, if a guy is masturbating it does not mean he does not want you. Think of it almost as a physiological function of male existence. It is actually a healthy thing, and if he doesn't keep that gun loaded all the time your sessions are likely to last longer.

4. Have you ever attended a group masturbation party? Same-sex or mixed?

Ewww..really these things exist? "Clean Up on aisle 6...and Hal we are gonna need a bucket!"

What do the invitations even look like? Oh I know little gold lamps and you rub them over and over and the invitation pops out!

5. When masturbating, as you reach orgasm, do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside? Or?

"do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside" WTF?!!! LOL...this question was OBVIOUSLY written by a woman! :-)

6. Have you ever video'ed yourself while masturbating (solo)? Where are they now?

No no no no no no..no way...wait...oops ..well not really. I mean there is kind of a picture out there somewhere. I mean it has been destroyed on my end. I can only hope she did the same AS PROMISED...or her computer got a virus, or her hard drive crashed, or it was destroyed in a flood. I mean a thought of the big purple people eater out there somewhere on the interweb...yikes!

Bonus (as in optional): How often do you use the word "fuck" (or its derivatives) in casual conversation - frequently, occasionally, rarely, never.

Ummmmm..did I mention I am from upstate New York, and that I marched in Drum Corps. Oh and that I grew up around volunteer firemen. I mean its like part of the curriculum growing up. In fact, I remember being taken out of class in the second grade to view the following instructional video! :-)





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