TMI - Tuesday ...A story break

I admit I still need to finish my story, but I have to be in the right mood to do it, and I have been battling so many things It just has not been in me. I will do some TMI in the meantime.

1. LUST: Besides your current Significant Other who do you lust for or have you lusted for?

Hmm since I don't have a S.O. I am free to lust for whomever...right? There is this woman in let's say in a country a little north of me. I lusted after her the other night. I would like to say thanks for everything. You are welcome to drunk email me A-N-Y-T-I-M-E! That was fun. You know who you are! ;-) A little more local..well there is one I'll admit I have lusted after her, but now I have kept it in check. Its a bit more than lust and ..hmmm.. man I could really ..I cannot even put it into words, but if she just gave me a chance. Not sure that will ever happen, but I can't spend my nights up worrying about it. Still I think I would show her some some pretty amazing and unbridled passion.

2. GLUTTONY: What food brings out your inner glutton?

Seriously... Crab legs, Chocolate, and Ginger Snaps. Of course not all at once, but certainly at different times. Oh oh oh I almost forgot whipped Cream from the can. I love that stuff and oh yes I WOULD Definitely eat it slowly off of you. I would lick every single bit of it. Just put it where you want my tongue to go! :-)

3. GREED: What are you greedy for?

Really?? sexually I think that is fairly obvious..umm...anything :-) I am also greedy for steady work, and I am working like a mofo to find it. I am college educated, and I have a lot of specific skills and talents. I am sure it won't be much longer...right?

4. SLOTH: What is your plan for an ideal day of sloth?

I really mean it when I say this. The perfect sloth day would be spending the day in bed with someone I was totally in love with. In reality I don't hold much hope for this any more. In fact, I try not to even think of it, and so it has become difficult to imagine. Still the idea is nice. even if it seems silly and sentimental to some.

5. WRATH: Describe a time that you let out a can of whoop ass on someone.

Yeah I got a problem with wrath. I am not an angry man, but there are times I could seriously destroy someone, and I am pretty capable of it. I like to refer to it as my inner "New York" There was a moment about a year ago when a guy I know who happened to be a lurker on my other blog took a pot shot at my failed marriage. He basically said that based on what he read in my blog its no wonder my wife left me. Which of course couldn't be further from the truth, but seriously for a while I was going to beat the shit out of him. I mean put him down hard. If someone harmed one of my children I would probably be that guy who jumps over the guard rail at court and just wails on the dude. It takes a lot really to get me to a point where fight or flight kicks in, but I would probably be pretty dangerous if forced to fight.

6. ENVY: Who or what do you envy? Why?

Envy..hmm this is a tough one. I mean there are possibilities for so much here, but when does it go from infatuation, admiration or mild jealousy to envy. After thinking about it I think this example is as near a definition of Envy as I can get>>> Ok, so there is this person and she was going with a guy who basically discarded her when he was done with her. I was envious because he totally had her heart and didn't care one bit about it, and it was the only thing I wanted and couldn't have. Some of which had to do with the way he had left her emotionally. That is envy. Make sense?

7. PRIDE: Have you ever had to swallow your pride? What are you proud of?

Truthfully, I swallow my fucking pride every goddamn morning these days. What am I proud of?
well I am proud of my children. They make me cry sometimes I am so proud of them. I am proud of the way I handled my divorce and treat my ex. I always try to be decent , civil, and not an ass. When I am an ass I am quick to apologize and fix the situation. I think if you talked to her she would agree. I am proud of the fact that I still get up every morning and fight the good fight even though most days are like a hard kick in the nuts. I am proud of my two world championships. They may not mean much to most folks, but twice I was undisputed the best in the world at something and that was no small feat trust me. I spent a lot a lot a lot of hours preparing with 128 other folks on my team.

A story

THE TMI questions didn't relly do anything for me this week and I couldn't title this story..so enjoy it for what it is.
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He looked across the room. His eyes were fixated on her if even for a moment. He prayed she didn't notice, he didn't want to seem desperate or strange, but she was amazing. She stopped him dead in his tracks and he wasn't even sure why. He had no hopes though. He wasn't hoping to meet her, and he certainly didn't think she would notice him. After she passed out of site he lowered his head and shook it a little bit , smiled, and thought to himself what was he even thinking. He was lonely there was no doubt about that, but these things never seemed to work out for him, so he did what he always did. He pushed it down he swallowed hard and went on talking to friends, having a few drinks and getting on with the night. Still he was distracted in his head and he wondered. She left him breathless if even for a moment.

The night wore on, the crowd got larger, and the music seemed to get louder. He slipped away to another part of the party, a place a little quieter, and where he could get a re-fill on his drink. He used to think of it as liquid courage, but as the evening carried on it was just to get him through another night. He turned around and suddenly there she was right in his face, and for a moment in time he was frozen. He smiled and tried to be charming, but admittedly he always felt awkward. "Hi" she said I saw you earlier " Do I know you?" . He cracked some joke..lame at best..but she laughed. It was a start of a conversation. It was nice and it was everything he could do to hide how nervous he was. He always seemed to blow it at "Hello", but things strangely enough were going smoothly. She was giving him signs, but he wasn't getting it..nope not a clue. She touched him, she talked to him as if no one else was there, she flipped her hair. How could he not see what was going on here. They had common friends and common interests, but all he could see was a conversation that would eventually fade and she would disappear. He wouldn't know well enough to ask her out again, or even get her number, but still they talked and enjoyed each other's company.

As the evening wore on she suddenly leaned into him and whispered "would you like to go somewhere more private?" He leaned back rather quickly, and looked at her and she smiled at him. At first he thought maybe this was a joke, or maybe a friend had put her up to it. This stuff just NEVER happens to him..never. He struggled for the words, and he doesn't know how but "Yeah that would be nice" slipped from his lips and she took him by the hand.

She lead him into a room somewhere in the house. It was quiet and dark. He nervously joked "Now What" and she kissed him and He kissed back. He brushed the hair from her face and tucked it behind one ear and he kissed her neck, and then her ear. He made his way back to her lips and ran his fingers through her hair and as he pulled her in and kissed her even more deeply. His other hand was in the small of her back. He wanted his hand to wander, but he didn't know if he should. He still didn't want to seem to forward. Her hands slid from his face, to his broad shoulders, along his chest and down the side of his body. Then she grabbed his crotch. He gasped it had been such a long time, and then suddenly for no reason he began to tremble. He pulled back, and she could feel him tremble. She whispered in his ear "Its OK baby just relax" she knew he was nervous and she was glad to exert some control.

As soon as he heard those words he relaxed. Then it all came rushing upward. The desire, the passion the fire..the pure lust within him. He remembered it all. It had been so long but it was always there just boiling under the surface. He kissed her, He pulled at her, and his hands went up her shirt and she raised her hands so he could easily slip it off over her head...... to be continued.....

There is a story coming

OK, I see you ladies write a lot of erotica...I am gonna take a shot...very soon. You know guys can write this stuff too, and I think I can do a little bit better than "We did it...Booyah!" :-) Who knows maybe even another HNT this Thursday. We will see how it goes...baby steps.....

TMI - Tuesday ..OMG Yes this is TMI

TMI Tuesday - The Masturbation Love Making Edition

1. When you masturbate, how long, typically, is your session and what do you think about (other than having an orgasm)?

Oh see now guys its different. I mean sometimes it can be like blam and you are spackling the walls, or sometimes it can take forever ESPECIALLY if you lose concentration. Believe it or not sometimes it takes forever, and doesn't even happen and you give up. Sure, I try to keep my "eye on the prize" but then other thoughts creep in...Football...Pizza...Beer..Bills...To Do List...crap...fail! Yes, we also fantasize Twosomes...Threesomes...Foursomes...you get the picture.

Oh and for the record if you are female and reading this. I very may well likely have fantasized about YOU, one of your pictures, a story you wrote or all three! :-D

2. Have you ever been "caught" masturbating?

Yes, by the Ex and if I am being honest I didn't feel very guilty about it. She caused me to have to masturbate a lot. In fact, I think she probably preferred my masturbation to our sex life at one point!

3. Have you ever masturbated in front of your computer? If 'yes' was it for your own purposes or for someone's viewing pleasure?

Yes ...of course...I mean like the Internet is for Porn right? I mean what guy hasn't seriously! It was purely for my own pleasure I am not doing that on a webcam! Well not yet at least. I think it is sexy watching females masturbate (I prefer it live instead of online). It is sexy as hell, although I don't know if women feel the same about watching guys polish their sword. I have known some women who would have been upset if they knew I masturbated while I was with them. However, let me to say to every woman who has ever wondered. If you find your guy in an act of self-love don't panic! I repeat DO NOT PANIC its not about YOU! Seriously, if a guy is masturbating it does not mean he does not want you. Think of it almost as a physiological function of male existence. It is actually a healthy thing, and if he doesn't keep that gun loaded all the time your sessions are likely to last longer.

4. Have you ever attended a group masturbation party? Same-sex or mixed?

Ewww..really these things exist? "Clean Up on aisle 6...and Hal we are gonna need a bucket!"

What do the invitations even look like? Oh I know little gold lamps and you rub them over and over and the invitation pops out!

5. When masturbating, as you reach orgasm, do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside? Or?

"do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside" WTF?!!! LOL...this question was OBVIOUSLY written by a woman! :-)

6. Have you ever video'ed yourself while masturbating (solo)? Where are they now?

No no no no no no..no way...wait...oops ..well not really. I mean there is kind of a picture out there somewhere. I mean it has been destroyed on my end. I can only hope she did the same AS PROMISED...or her computer got a virus, or her hard drive crashed, or it was destroyed in a flood. I mean a thought of the big purple people eater out there somewhere on the interweb...yikes!

Bonus (as in optional): How often do you use the word "fuck" (or its derivatives) in casual conversation - frequently, occasionally, rarely, never.

Ummmmm..did I mention I am from upstate New York, and that I marched in Drum Corps. Oh and that I grew up around volunteer firemen. I mean its like part of the curriculum growing up. In fact, I remember being taken out of class in the second grade to view the following instructional video! :-)





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Now playing: The Vapors - Turning Japanese

Sexual Healing

Yeah..no...I haven't received any sexual healing yet (God I wish) still I am not willing to let this part of me go just yet. I guess I am trying to keep hope alive. This does not mean I am being overly optimistic I am gonna "get some" any soon, but it does mean I am not going to close my eyes and my mind to the possibilities. I mean after all I may be in my early forties, but I am virile , strong, and quite capable of performing ( and performing, and performing, and performing :-)). Seriously though it may have been a while, but I still know my way around the bedroom and female anatomy for that matter. I mean I may not be a master at something like "rope skills" but I was a Boy Scout and I can still tie a good slipknot! :-)

Any way I have been thinking about the things that have been holding me up and holding me back and they are all in my head. I think part of the problem is maybe expectations, but again I don't want to drop my standards. I think this is maturity speaking and not stupidity. I don't need to get laid for the sake of getting laid. Certainly not the first time out the shoot. I have thought about this a lot, and considering the fact that I have not been with another partner for a long long time, add to that I am coming up on nearly two years with nada I don't want just a "roll in the hay" necessarily. Yes, its true it is probably exactly what I need, but I want it to be with someone special. Not necessarily marriage special, or even love special, but someone I feel completely comfortable with. Ya know, so if things are a little rough I don't feel embarrassed or weird in any way. Someone I can take my time with, and have fun with and be relaxed with. I know this ideal is a little difficult to quantify in words, but I think most of you get the picture. This may not be someone I will spend the rest of my life with, but someone I will share a part of me with, and I just want to know it is not going to become public fodder, or a situation I regret.

I am comfortable with the idea this may take a little longer to achieve than just a quick lay and I am cool with it.

In the meantime this is some pretty funny shit from our friends across the pond. It is too sexual in nature to post on Facebook, so I thought I would share it with you pervs. I know sometimes its hard to understand because they barely speak English :-) but I think you will get the picture.

No fucking idea what to write anymore

Seriously, someone once asked me "If I was seeing someone who didn't like what I wrote here could I give it up?" My answer was if it was the right person for the right reason absolutely. This blog will never take the place of a good and meaningful relationship. The truth is quite frankly I could give this blog up for less. First off I have been sick for three days straight, so as you can imagine I am not feeling very sexy. However, I am not sure what the point is anymore. I think if you have a sex blog you should have something to write about. I read about your trysts, your hot dates with your husbands, even your secret hot rendezvous, and I got nothing. I am no longer sure if it makes me feel any better or worse to write here. I am losing sight of what the value is of posting half naked pictures of myself or divulging my secret sexual tendencies. In fact, I am not even sure if anyone is even really reading this blog.

Yeah I like sex, yes I love women but the reality is both of them escape me, and I am not even sure I want to think about it. It's just frustrating and makes me feel broken inside to be honest. Seriously, I feel like something is wrong with me and I wish I knew what it was.

If I decide to keep posting here or not, well I will just have to let life decide that for me. I know its sad but it is like the spark, the passion, the fire inside of me is fading into acceptance...maybe I should just get a cat and sweater vest.

TMI - Tuesday/Wednesday..whatever ..To be or not to be

1. Have eyes that always smile or a voice that makes people calm?

Well since I am half Irish I already have smilin' eyes, so a voice that makes people calm. I actually already have that too. I spent many years working on the phone, and have become acutely aware of voice tone, inflection, and what people say. I can calm you or provoke you on the single turn of a word if I am concentrating. It is a skill. I have been told by a lot of people I have a great phone voice perhaps I should consider making a living doing phone sex :-)

**Oh and for the record, just cause I am a professional doesn't mean I am not human and when I lose my cool I still stay stupid shit on the phone...I am a total goof sometimes!!

2. Have an affair and your partner catches you or your partner have an affair and you catch him/her?

Really neither...both would break my heart. My ex caught me mid sentence in an emotional affair. It was without a doubt the single most worst moment of my existence on this planet. In some ways I am sure she would have rather caught me mid-coitus than read that sentence. I used to joke with her that if she was having an affair I only had one request "let me watch". She hated that and in some ways I suppose it was cruel. I am sure she realized I didn't really mean it, but deep down inside it was more of cry for any type of attention versus what I was getting then which was zip. However, if I have to pick an answer I will go with what others said and say "catch her" cuz it took me a long long long time to repair myself from feeling like such an awful heel.

3. Have better sex or more money?

I bet you thought I would say better sex, however I am going to say more money. The sad truth is with more money I could probably be having more sex in which case I would only improve.

4. Be able to read everyone’s mind all the time or always know the future?

Oh fuck no doubt about read every one's mind all the time. You would think that would drive someone insane, but man oh man it would shave so much time off in the dating world. I mean think about it you are going to know in the first 2 minutes of date whether you are going to get laid or dumped. It is the difference between taking her to a fine restaurant or MacDonalds, or even better feigning a sudden illness and saving yourself from having to spend anything on the dollar menu!

5. Your partner have sex with someone else or fall in love with someone else?

Yes, this has been asked. men are territorial..it's in our nature...so neither. However, if forced to chose then sex..cuz you don't just fall out of love, but I have fallen out of bed many times.

Bonus (as in optional): What one thing, big or small, would you change in your life if granted one wish by a lamp-bound genie? Why

Really did you HAVE to use the words Big or Small? With my luck the Genie would be partially deaf . I would be standing in my living room with a tiny guy playing piano screaming at the Genie "WTF?!! I DID NOT ASK FOR A 12 Inch Pianist!!" Seriously I would ask that Genie to make me a US Senator in a state without term limits, so I could be set for life.